sometimes, something will not happen

Salam

sometimes, i wish that i can turn back time,
so that unwanted things won't happen.

but i can't.

sometimes, i wish that i can see the future,
so that i can plan to make sure that all unwanted things will not happen.

but i can't

so i just let the time pass by,
and just let things happen.

because this is my life.

we can plan something,
we can try to avoid something,
we can try to do something.

but sometimes, that particular something will not happen according to our expectations.

because this is life all about.


i wish that i'm strong enough, but i'm not really that strong.
not that i'm not capable, it's just because sometimes i don't feel strong,

because that's the nature of human being.


sometimes i'm tired being me.
tired of my life
tired of my situations and problems
tired of people around me

because i'm not a machine, i'm a human being.

but because i'm a human being, i have the chance to experience all of them.

i'm lucky.
lucky enough because God still gives me the air to breathe.

when i breathe, i know that i'm still alive
when i breathe, i know that i'm still awake
when i breathe, i know that i'm still in this world

most important,

when i breathe, i know that i'm still alive, in my life.

and for that, thank you Allah :)

"So when you lose your way
To Allah you should turn
As HE promise HE will always be there… "
(Maher Zain , Always be there)

fullstop,
wassalam~

(note : perasaan bercampur baur macam rojak. sehinggakan mampu menangis kesedihan sambil bergelak tawa dalam waktu yang sama ketika seorang diri.sungguh merojakkan sekali perasaan ini. bipolar disorder mungkin T____T )